Why Zebras Get Scurvy

The more I learn about Ehlers-Danlos, the stranger I find it–and the more important I discover collagen is to our basic bodily functions. With the recent medical discovery of a new organ that functions as our body’s connectivity highway, collagen appears to be even more important. Collagen, for those of you not “in the know” about it, does more than plump your lips. It forms the functional building-blocks of most of our body’s tissues–ligaments, tendons, connective tissues between organs, muscles, skin, teeth… pretty much everything but our bones. If you have EDS, this means that all of that stuff is compromised in some way, shape, or form.

The types of EDS–hypermobile, vascular, etc.–explain how our collagen is defective and which systems are the most impacted. Mine (hEDS) impacts the connective tissues in my joints: tendons, ligaments, and cartilage.

But EDS is pretty weird, too, and causes some absolutely bizarre things.

Lots of us, for instance, will need to use both acne medication and wrinkle cream at the same time. Because clearly dealing with constant injuries and chronic pain isn’t annoying enough, we get to have acne into our thirties, forties, and later.

We have baby-soft skin that would be the envy of every lotion and bodywash commercial known to humankind… except that the same skin that’s super soft to the touch is also highly prone to bruising, scarring, and stretch marks, so it’s not all that pretty to look at and has little ridges all over.

Most EDS folks look much younger than we actually are. I got carded well into my thirties (it still happens occasionally), and I was even carded for an R movie at the age of 28… a full 11 years after I was legally of age to watch it. People say I will be grateful for this “when you’re older.” I won’t, because I would much rather LOOK older and feel like I’m my current age… rather than having arthritis by 20 and discussing knee replacements at 36. It’s also really infuriating to have people say “But you aren’t old enough for that…” (I really wish that were true.)

And my favorite “weird” EDS thing. Collagen production is promoted by protein and vitamin C. A lack of enough vitamin C causes a drop in collagen production or causes collagen to be faulty–resulting in a disease called scurvy. Yes, the scurvy that pirates and eighteenth-century sailors used to get because they didn’t have citrus.

What this means, in essence, is that zebras (people with EDS) basically have a low-grade form of scurvy all the time. (Yarrr!) We have gum problems, bruise easily, have easily broken skin, loose joints, difficulty building muscle… all things that also manifest in the mid-to-late stages of scurvy when the body is denied vitamin C. Zebras (EDSers) naturally have deficient collagen, which means that our bodies do all the things that the citrus-starved pirates’ bodies did when they sailed around the Cape of Good Hope without fruit–even when we do eat our citrus.

So feed your zebra lots of oranges and grapefruits, and treat them gently when you sail the high seas!